There is a user from Fstdt who’s username is Bastethotep. He tricked me on Discord that he had the answers to the mysteries in Niam’s unfinished story so that I could use that knowledge to complete my version. I found out he was lying when he made ridiculous claims such as King Michael being in love with Abaddon and Sir Lancelot’s affair with Guinevere being a coverup for a gay affair with King Arthur. I therefore wrote this story to humiliate him in revenge.

Now Bastethotep was an obese man who struggled to find true love. One day at the grocery store, he found an attractive woman who was wearing a shirt of the biology company she worked at. He thought that at last, he found his future scientist wife. He had an erection.

His erect penis stuck out in his pants and the woman noticed. “Gross!” she said and walked away.

Bastethotep was in despair that he was rejected and he stomped his foot. Being obese, he lost his balance and crashed into the meat section. The manager came out and was furious.

“We will either sue you for damages in court or you can make up for it by doing me a favor by helping me in the meat packaging room put back.”

“I’ll do you the favor,” said Bastethotep relieved that he could avoid being sued.

In the meat packaging room, the manager pointed to the meat grinder and said, “Since you ruined the meat, we will turn you into meat.”

And Bastethotep was shoved into the meat grinder and made into hamburgers and hot dogs. Customers thought that they were just eating normal beef and pork. That was until the female scientist noticed a different taste and wondered if the grocery store started using some cheap fake meat to save money. She did an ELISA test to find out which proteins were in the meat and was shocked by her discovery. The manager and his accomplices were arrested.

While burning in hell for not accepting Jesus Christ as his Lord and savior and repenting of his sins, Bastethotep thought that at least his murderers would get sent to hell to. But then he saw a vision of an evangelist doing jail ministry convincing the manager and his accomplices to repent of their sins and accept Jesus Christ as their Lord and savior.

Fortunately Bastethotep, the plan to terraform Hell and invade Heaven to take both realms' natural resources was already underway. Bastethotep being one of the damned never had the opportunity to forgive his murderers in person, but did so on Zoom. May this story be taught as a lesson of God’s infinite cruelty, that he sent His son to die to close a loophole for a stupid rule that He made up in the first place, so that no matter what evil deed you did, you can be forgiven if you make it right to the people you have hurt.

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